I’ve argued for Android over Apple for years. But, my arguments always fell on not deaf ears, but ears that just weren’t willing to listen in the first place.

And after a long time reflecting and researching, I can firmly say there is only one argument in the defense of Apple products: “It’s better because it’s an IPhone.”

“Well that just can’t be!” you may be thinking to yourself. But I want to actually look at the arguments put forwards by the average Apple fan.

The most popular attempt at persuasion is that Apple’s camera’s are superior. Well, sorry to disappoint you but that’s just not true.

We’re well beyond the point of claiming that a difference in megapixels improves the camera quality, and that is a non-starter as virtually all flagship devices are equipped with 12 megapixel cameras these days.

No, the only thing influencing your picture quality is the on-board software your device offers. And with every facet of that software easily accessible and tunable in the Android offerings, if you are actually going to go for the best picture in every situation, any flagship Android is leagues ahead of the IPhone.

But “the looks of the IPhone as well as the feel is what’s really so far ahead,” you may think. Seeing as that’s all subjective, you’d think I couldn’t rebut that very-articulate talking point, but alas, I am become death, the destroyer of Tim Cook.

With Android being an open source operating system, any company can produce a phone running Android, meaning you have literally hundreds of options and opportunities to find the perfectly designed phone for you, whether it be a giant monster with weeks worth of battery life, or a sleek little number devoid of those ever shrinking bezels.

“Well, fine, but I just prefer IPhone, it’s simply my preference.” There we go. Preferring Apple is fine, if you like the brand recognition and the leftovers of Steve Jobs’ cult of personality, go for it. But don’t pretend that it’s because IPhone is superior in a mystical way that the rest of us dullards are incapable of divining.